A Sober Perspective

Since my last drink of alcohol about 3 years ago, I have developed a self discipline in order to maintain my sobriety. After I crawled into alcoholics anonymous for my first meeting, the sober alcoholics who shared their stories, suggestions, and weirdness with me was a good distraction from a drink. I kept coming back….sometimes 3 times a day early in my recovery. Eventually, the craving diminished and alcohol lost its power.

I’m not cured from alcohol.

Today, I still have streaks which my mind tells me a cold beer on a hot summer day would be excellent. Streaks that tell me a shot of whiskey before bed will slow my thoughts down for a better night of sleep. Streaks that tell me I got full control over my past drinking habits. Ultimately, I can not trust my own thinking.

The past two weeks, I have been around individuals who consume a lot of alcohol on a daily basis. Their behavior has not changed since I entered recovery almost 3 years ago. Today, I can stand back with clarity and use my observations as a tool to maintain my sobriety. Normally, I would not position myself within this situation but made a conscience decision based on many variables that involve family.

My disease has inadvertently provided me with two gifts: self discipline and unselfishness.

• Self discipline to maintain complete control of my nervous system. To feel good, sad, happy, relax, etc. can lead to distorted choices. Feelings are not facts. Emotional thinking can result in destructive logic for an alcoholic because of the extreme “all or nothing” mindset.
• Unselfishness which battles my ego. My mind consistently reminds me of the inconvenience to serve others. To get out of self. To take action for others. Afterwards, the end result has always been rewarding. It’s not about me or what I want, it’s about serving others.

I’m not a saint. I have developed good living by forcing myself into a program to stop drinking alcohol almost 3 years ago and it shook me to the core. After a year within recovery, I realized that alcoholics anonymous was not enough. I began to read Greek Philosophy (refer to my older Medium articles). Today, philosophy provides me insight on a good life and alcoholics anonymous meetings are reminders of why I choose not to drink.